Stop Crying!

One of my greatest failures as a parent is telling my kids not to cry. Certainly their crying doesn't hurt anyone. It's just that this crazy, suffocating anxiety builds up inside of me until I burst.

As I type, my youngest is experiencing an intense meltdown. As he recklessly screams and cries out in frustration over the results of his own silly and impulsive decision, I want to say, "be quiet. This is your own fault." But instead, today, I recognize his frustration and I type.

I wonder if the immaturity of his extremely dramatic response is the result of my previously depriving him the opportunity to mourn his human vulnerability to making mistakes.

He was a single dollar short from buying something he really wanted. I  recommended that he return after earning that dollar. But instead he settled on something cheaper. It was a collector's pack, where you can't see what you've gotten until you open it. Well, he got two very girlie figures which he describes as, "stupid".

So he cries. And I decide that this is a beautiful moment not to interrupt. How many times in my adult life have I allowed my desire to spend money outweigh my logic for doing so? Most every one of those moments left me empty; still hungry for whatever fulfillment I expected from my frivolous investment in junk.

Will letting him express his remorse ruin him? I'm hoping it will teach him to prevent this impulsive and illogical method of seeking fulfillment in the future. I'm hoping it will teach him that no matter the extent of his fit throwing, the end result is the same. He's going to have to accept the reality of his choice and hopefully grow from it.

Parenting isn't easy. But as I think about it as an opportunity to emulate Christ in my own life, my response to these moments change. Its at my saddest most tear-filled moments that I found the Lord. He didn't keep me from feeling the pain attached to my own moments of stupidity. He just extended Grace and an opportunity to try again as I sought him in them.